The Big Day - Part 1

I've thought a lot in the last couple days about how I don't even know where to start with wedding recaps. I have a million things I want to write down, but I can't quite figure out how to organize them, or what to write about first. I figure I'll just start writing... and if it doesn't make sense, so be it! I keep telling people that ask "how was it?" that everything was amazing... but half the time I was in such a blur it didn't even click that the whole day was literally all about US. I would stop dancing/talking/running around every now and then and it would hit me that I was living MY wedding, it wasn't just a dream or something I was counting down to anymore... it was actually really and truly happening. I can't quite describe the feeling, but I assume I'm not alone in that sentiment. In the end, all I can really say is that it was incredible.

I started my wedding day with the most insanely nervous stomach EVER. Typical. I guess I knew it would happen, but considering how calm I felt the rest of the week, I suppose a part of me thought I'd somehow remain calm that day too. I was wrong. I barely slept Friday night, and when the hair and makeup girls knocked on the door of my gramma's at 6:30am I knew my chances of sleeping just a little bit more were over. I started a pepto-bismol and half a xanax routine bright and early, and unfortunately didn't manage to keep much of a breakfast down, so I switched to pretzels and ginger-ale and tried to keep myself busy. I had all of my bridesmaids with me, and despite my stomach telling me otherwise, everything was surprisingly calm for most of the morning.

The lilies my mom and I picked up Thursday morning were ALL still closed at 11pm Friday night, so it was literally a miracle that they were suddenly open on Saturday morning - just in time for me to realize I didn't have the floral tape with me to make the bouquets. Thankfully, Jeff had stayed at our house with Dan, and was able to drive the floral tape over for me, and after I wrapped one together the girls took over and finished the rest in no time. The flowers didn't hold up through the day at all, but I sort of actually appreciated not having to carry them around. The not caring was half the point of buying farmers market flowers in the first place, but I am a little nervous that the lack of flowers in all of our hands is going to look "off" in the bridal party photos. We'll see I guess!

When Ben and Mindy showed up things suddenly got very REAL for me, and although I immediately went into a frenzy, I also immediately got a new sense of calm... because that's what amazing photographers do for you I guess, without even trying. I knew that the day was (in a way) in their hands at that point, and I trust them immensely, so I started to let go and just... be the bride.

All of a sudden my hair was still in curlers and I knew I was going to be late for my first look with Dan. Mindy gave me a pep talk and pointed out that the "updated" timing would still work out perfectly. Getting dressed happened insanely fast, and I realized too late that I wanted all of my bridesmaids there and they weren't. But, I had my mom, Manda and gramma, so I'm sure the pictures will be treasured in my family forever, and I will cherish them.

At some point Bridget gave me a little box. In it was a charm bracelet of sorts that she made for me - it had something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue on it. She wrapped it around my bouquet for me and once it is restrung into a bracelet I will wear it regularly to remind me of how much our friendship grew throughout my engagement, and how I never would have made it through it all (laughing the entire time!) without her. I also had my gramma's bracelet as a something borrowed, my turquoise shoes and a pin Mr. Lawler gave me years ago as something blues, and the flowers on my shoes made of my mom's veil and button of my late grandmother's attached to the flower in my hair as something olds. I loved that I had so many little "tokens" of special people in my life with me all day.

I remember walking down the stairs focusing only on not falling. My aunt and uncle were there and I didn't know it, and I likely started to cry when I saw them. My 8 year old cousin who is usually hyper and off the wall was just sitting there grinning ear to ear and waving at me. His sister who I still imagine as a little kid was wearing a strapless dress and was seriously gorgeous. I am still talking about how pretty she looked that day, and seeing her is the last thing I remember about being at my gramma's house.

To be continued...